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Amazing Facts






 


  THE BANYAN TREE
  ASSERTIVENESS TRAINING
 
I love Mankind; its just people I can't stand.

- Anonymous

Assert :
v.t. Vindicate a claim to (rights) oneself, insist upon one's rights, declare. Hence -able, -ive,-ively.adv. -iveness. As (sere sert-join) put one's hand on slave's head to free him or claim him; claim, affirm.

- The Concise Oxford Dictionary

To assert is to state positively with great confidence, but with no objective proof.

- Webster's Dictionary

INTRODUCTION

Human interaction is the crux of our life and society. The subtleties of our relationships, our loves, hates, commitments and duties make us what we are.
These human bonds - complex , universal and so much a part of our daily existence, whether on a personal or sociopolitical level, are largely responsible for the quality of our lives and thoughts, and not the least, our mental health.
Schools, colleges and other learning institutions enlighten us on a variety of subjects and equip us to "face life" economically, socially and intellectually. However, there is no school which educates us about ourselves and the ways in which to conduct ourselves in the multitude of relationships that we are called upon to engage in from day to day : child and parent , brother and sister, student and teacher, employee and boss, servant and master to mention a few. Each one of us learns this independently, through trial and error and eventually develop certain typical ways of coping with people and situations.
In the course of our interactions, we have all had the experience, some time or the other of facing conflict. Even in our daily interactions with parents, friends, strangers and relatives, we are often faced with the dilemma of either expressing our feelings honestly and directly, thereby running the risk of hurting them and losing their affection and thoughts, and thereby creating uncomfortable undercurrents of hostility and resentment in the relationship.
Is it all right to express anger, when one's personal rights are violated, or should one simply keep quiet? How does one express anger without breaking off a relationship? Does one protest when cheated or manipulated, or overlook it ? How does one handle an insolent clerk at the Post Office ? How does one handle continual nagging at home, or sugar coated putdown outside, and the endless number of irritant that we encounter in our relationships without completely hassled or fazed? These are some of the questions this chapter will attempt to examine.
Section I of this chapter will focus on the dynamics of human interpersonal behaviour, i.e. the different ways in which we cope with people and situations. The concepts of Fight and Flight, Non Assertiveness, Assertiveness and Aggressiveness will be discussed, followed by manipulative coping. There will be a brief discussion on the role of anger and the difference between anger and aggression.
Section 2 will define Assertive Behavior and examine in a little detail the components of assertiveness and some techniques of assertive behaviour.
And finally Section 3 will look at some programs for Assertiveness Training for individuals and groups.

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